I see it...

For the first time in twenty five years, I look exactly how I want to look. I am a freak, I am beautiful and I can finally accept and embrace that.

Walk, walk, fashion baby...

I'm going through a change of fashion heart. I'm super inspired by pastels at the moment, as well as nu-goth, 90s grunge and Japanese street fashions. I'm incorporating a hell of a lot of thrifted items into my wardrobe and a lot of lavender lace, velvet and ripped tees. Like a May flower or maybe the change in medication dosage allowed me to express my colourful interior on my exterior. Anyway, here is some stuff that is inspiring me at the moment:

Don't Be Jealous of My Boogie...

Last night I hit the town in order to welcome the last three week of semester. I wanted to do a really dramatice make-up look inspired by Petrilude and Ru Paul and girl, I worked it. Here it is:

I used Sugarpill eyeshadow in Poison Plum, Tako for the highlight and Bulletproof for the brows and crease. I also used Urban Decay's Open eyeshadow for blending. I used L.A. Splash liquid eyeliner to line the upper lid and make the wing on the lower lid. On the lids I used a combination of Glamour Doll Eyes' Rave and Hollywood glitters.

For the rest of the look I used Sugarpill's Dollipop for cheeks and shades from Smashbox's contour palette for..none other than the contouring. For the lips I used a combination of OCC's Reverb and Harlot Lip tars. I certainly was wearing the same amount of make-up as a Drag Queen. Enjoy.

Outfit Post: Flower Child

I rocked this outfit when my fiance and I hit the arcade on Friday night. We spent a few hours playing Point Blank, Time Crisis and this awesome Japanese game called Bishi Bashi. We then sat by the Yarra River, hundreds of lights from the buildings above dancing on the water's surface, and ate Cherry Ripe and Mint gelati. It was an awesome night and a much needed break from hours of archive searching.

Glass Half Full....

I got my glasses today and guess what? I can see! I got two awesome pairs: one pair for school and one for "play". My transformation into sexy librarian is almost complete...So what do you think? Hot, right?

Framing questions

This week I am totally obsessing over glasses. Why? Well, the short answer is that after a quick visit to the optometrist on Saturday I was informed of my short-sightedness and given a prescription for glasses. I chose two rather snazzy pairs of glasses and I will be picking them up in a week (!!) But, in the mean time I am going to obsess over gorgeous gals who rock gorgeous frames if that's alright with you?













Photos from Top to Bottom: Gala Darling, Nubby Twiglet, Arabella, Zoetica Ebb, Helena Bonham Carter and Gala Darling...again because she has some fierce frame style.

Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes...

Voila! I have chocolate brown hair. For the first time in about five years I have something close to what can be considered "normal" hair and for the first time since I was twelve, I have something close to my natural hair colour. Over the years I have coloured my hair many times with many different shades ranging from pastel pink to dark green. It's liberating and exciting to have a colour a bit more classic and sedate in my hair. I feel more mature, more natural and actually, a lot more like myself.

I'm rockin' the sexy librarian look for real and I think I will keep on rockin' it for a while.

Mirror, mirror on the wall...

Today, after a gruelling hour and a half of “punching and kicking my way to fitness”, I decided to go to one of my favourite second hand stores and indulge in some ‘vintage’ items for my wardrobe. I took the twenty minute tram ride, sitting next to a man who smelled like he hadn’t showered in a year and across from a woman who kept staring at my hands, to the outskirts of the Melbourne CBD and found my recycled clothing Heaven. I walked through the smudgy, fingerprinted door and proceeded to scavenge.

It was slim pickings, the rise in Hipster culture means that anything that can be remotely classed as ‘vintage’ is now about ten times the price it was a year ago, but I managed to find a few choice pieces. I lined up outside the change rooms, basket of goodies in hand, excited to dress up and play around. A door creaked open and it was finally my turn so I squished into the tiny, dimly lit room and hesitantly undressed. Now, I say hesitantly because the room was dusty, less than well lit and cramped, not because I was scared to view my reflection. Although, that soon changed.

So, there I was. Standing in my sports bra and panties, giving myself the inevitable once over. What. The. Hell. Happened? I don’t remember those dimples being there! What are those lines? Do my tits really sit that low? Is that a stretch mark? Oh God! I was shocked. I looked dreadful, dimply, and pouchy. I quickly rushed to try on what I had to try on, disliking everything immensely and constantly cringing at the flashes of skin that poked through the garments, and ended up leaving in a deep depression; lacking not only new clothes but the self esteem I had walked in with.

I was distraught. I thought my body finally looked how I wanted it to look! After years of hard work and a forty kilo weight loss I thought I was finally proud to look at my body in the mirror. Two minutes in a change room changed all of that, or so I thought. After my horrendous experience I decided to ask (and read) around and see if other women felt as badly about their bodies while in a change room as I did. And the answer was “Yes”! Many female friends cited the lighting in change rooms as a primary problem – poorly positioned, not bright enough, and seemingly determined to accentuate every flaw in a woman’s physique. Light bulb moment! It’s not me, it’s the change room. Other women agreed that in the fight against low self-esteem, change rooms are on the side of low self-esteem.

Seventy five per cent of women questioned in a recent study said they had stopped trying on clothes in changing rooms because issues such as poor lighting, and mirror placement, lowered their self confidence and caused “changing room rage” (which leads women act aggressively towards sales staff and leave the store).

So, why is it that clothing stores have these horribly evil dressing rooms that diminish self confidence? Is it because, as a female friend suggested, it inspires you to cover your body with the store’s clothing and in turn spend more money? Or, is it just more cost effective to have flickering, dim, poorly positioned lights in tiny dressing rooms? It can’t be the first suggestion; studies have shown that women would rather run out of a store empty handed than stare at their reflection in the dressing room mirrors of doom. And the second suggestion? Maybe it is cost effective but I’m not sure I believe that is why changing rooms induce these deep seated feelings of insecurity and doubt in women.

Maybe it’s a global conspiracy to knock women down a peg. Maybe without our clothing for protection we more easily fall prey to feelings of self-doubt and low self-esteem. I don’t know. Whatever it is, I sure as hell don’t like it and with eighty per cent of women in today’s society suffering poor body image, I don’t think the rest of the female population likes it (or needs it) either.

La Dame Violette

When you are through changing, you are through.

Personal Jesus

Your own Personal Jesus
Feeling's unknown and you're all alone
Flesh and bone by the telephone
Lift up the receiver
I'll make you a believer
I will deliver
You know I'm a forgiver
Reach out and touch faith
Your own Personal Jesus
Reach out and touch faith.